Am I weird for feeling like I don't?
Some people experience extreme highs and lows. I am not one of those people. Some people seem to devote themselves to a cause with intense singlemindedness. I'm not one of those people, either.
Lately I've been wondering if there's something wrong with me for being somewhat phlegmatic rather than passionate and intense. I don't mean to say that I never feel strongly about anything nor that I'm uninterested in anything and everything around me, but I don't feel any burning desire to focus my time and energy on any specific cause.
It could come from reading the latest installment of "One Day", Teach For America's alumni magazine, which is filled with stories of TFA alums doing amazing and inspiring things, or maybe it's recent conversations with Robb about any of his various projects. All I know is I feel staid and rather boring.
My diabetes does require that I carefully manage my energy expenditures and stress levels, but I hate to think that I'm...well...staid and boring. So I ask you: Is it odd to not have a Passion (yes, with a capital "P"), or am I A-OK? What are your thoughts?
3 comments:
Hey, Daughter -- it's nice to know that someone else in this family is cool, calm and collected like me! Years ago I told your mother, when she asked me why I didn't get excited about things, that she got excited enough for both of us (about everything). To a large extent, that's still true. You will find times, places and things that will excite you and you will be passionate about them, but like me you may be calm far more often than you are excited. I think this has brought a certain stability to our marriage and our family. If two people are exceedingly passionate about different things, it can cause some difficulties in the home. So even though you may be more like me than you realize, it can be more of a blessing than a handicap - at least I hope so. Love, Dad
Now I'll add my two cents worth...
As I look at most couples I know well, one of the two is always the calm, laid-back, never-frantic type B and the other is (like me) the classic type A - highly energetic, frequently stressed about something, and rarely if ever calm and laid-back. Folk wisdom says opposites attract, and as a matter of scientific fact, IT'S TRUE! Subconsciously, we all see the traits we lack in someone else, we admire them, and we usually end up marrying them -- then have to live with the fact that we are still the way we are and the other person is the way he/she is. However, neither way is wrong - just different. The reason you haven't recognized this, probably, is that it's more often the woman who is high-strung and the man who is calm, but not always. You may not have known any couples where the woman was the cool, calm, collected type, but I have -- several, in fact (and have occasionally envied them, wishing I were that way myself.) So -- there is nothing wrong with you at all. Try thinking of yourself as the new Greta Garbo -- she was one of the greatest femme fatales that ever lived and she was definitely not a Type A !!
I wouldn't sweat it Vanessa. I think I've done enough sweating over this issue for the both of us:) And I am an intense person- maybe that's why I felt I had to find something to be passionate about- to make life feel purposeful... I think as long as one's not vegging away, they are fine. You are being You, and that makes you anything but boring! That makes you an absolute hero!
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